Once I finished school and started to really grow into myself as an artist, I wanted to shed some of the old meanings and become something cleaner. I was tired of the whole "dark" persona and wanted a name that more closely matched the pure person I felt I was inside even if I still felt depressed and angry around it. As such the name still reflects that:

Part	Meaning
Anah	From Anactaën which meant angel in my fake language
kiasen	From Kiahse which meant inside

The idea was despite how I presented, how much I resented the world and people and whatnot, that inside it all I only ever wanted to do and be good. To love and be loved. I wanted to be my own salvation and in the end a lot of these various feelings and ideas of being someone trapped deep inside myself, ended up being transidentity poking its head.

I wasn't just unhappy to be locked inside my head, I was unhappy to be locked inside my body and current self. The angel I felt inside ended up being my true self as Emma which took years to come out.

When I started to have an identity on the internet, and went to open my first blog, I saw the need for a real nickname that I would own and understand, and that would carry meaning. I was working on my first short story collection at the time, and it featured a fake dead language that would go on to be used for naming a bunch of my stuff, including my first nickname. The meaning of the initials was:

Part	Meaning
The	To make it a "title" and my own
M	For Maxime which was my deadname at the time. It was meant to represent the "me" part of my nickname.
A	For Anakhronox which was built by bashing three words of the fake language ( anakhon + krhon + nox ), and meant more or less "nocturnal chaos demon". It was meant to represent the "bad side" of my identity, and the darkness I felt inside.
N	For Nickelbrauker which again mashed two words from my fake language ( nihkel + braucker ) and meant "perfect imperfection". It was meant to represent my good (albeit flawed) side. I felt I was a good person that was being failed by the world, and by my dark thoughts that encured.
6	For 666 since I was still before all an edgy acned teen!! It was meant to sandwich the "good" part of my nickname with more bad part, as I felt basically at the time I was a core of pure empathy and niceness wrapped in an angry scorned resentful teen. Bullying will do that to you.

Over time this got simplified and played with, until by the end of that era I was going by "LeHomme6" which was how French people used to jokingly pronounce the nickname.

Since 6 is pronounced "cis" in French, the irony is not lost on me that as a trans girl I used to go by "the cis man" for years. I guess I was compensating for people thinking I was effeminate and stuff, without even knowing then what actually was that vibe they were picking up on

My first nickname when I joined the internet, and the one that carries the least meaning. It was literally me as a kid, sitting in front of the text field, bashing my keyboard and then adding vowels until it was pronunciable (well sort of).

Most of what remains of that era is shitposts and game questions in various forums. Hopefully one day all of it is gone, because hot damn was I a real little (non toxic) troll back then!